Is a second date too early to… sing to someone?

I think I may have made a mistake on a date a few days ago. I sang for him…

Not a mistake in the sense that I feel I put him off… entirely the reverse. It just feels rather disproportionate. As if I suddenly became his romantic ideal… on the basis of my singing which, yes, is powerful, but is only a part of me. And I have a bad feeling about being seen as part of anyone’s romantic dream – it can so easily go horrendously wrong.

And there’s more. It’s true I want to find a partner who loves and respects and admires me… but I want to be able to respect and love and admire them too. And it’s so much more comfortable when these things can develop in harmony, rather than one person falling head over heels before the other person has got a grip on the situation.

And I really do feel uncomfortable when someone shows signs of developing a crush on me before I’ve decided what I feel about him. It makes me clam up and hold back – being overly cautious not to lead him on…

I’ve given him a very gentle warning that mistaking me for this operatic character will get in the way of him knowing the real me… I hope he responds.


2 responses to “Is a second date too early to… sing to someone?

  1. It’s never too early to sing to someone, I’ve met a few people myself just by listening to their voice and talking to them at the end of it. As long as you just sing a normal piece of music, and don’t sing a love song, if they take that too far, it’s not your fault. They don’t fall in love with opera singers on the tv do they?

  2. I suspect you have found someone who would have idealized you even if you had not sung a note….I don’t think you did him any harm…if he does end up getting hurt that’s his own issue and not your fault…

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